申请文书写作常见错误及分析

文章作者 100test 发表时间 2007:12:13 17:07:49
来源 100Test.Com百考试题网

（1）原句：In the school, Miss Li always been an inspiring source of help and support for me and others throughout the years.

　　编辑分析： “always been” Incorrect tense or missing word. “throughout the years” Flows better at the beginning of the sentence. “me and others” Reads awkwardly.

　　改正后：Throughout the years, Miss Li has always provided an invaluable source of assistance and support to many, including myself.

　　（2）原句： Miss Li is not only a mechanical teacher but also in charge of computer lab.

　　编辑分析： “is not only” Limit the use of the weak ‘to be’ verbs. “mechanical teacher” Can this be more specific? “in charge of” Directs.

　　改正后：Miss Li not only teaches mechanics, but also directs the computer lab.

　　（3）原句：Although her work is numerous, she tackled every task, no matter how trivial or monotonous, with great patience and meticulous care. But, with her creative mind, she was never content with merely doing her job, either.

　　编辑分析：“is numerous” Awkward. “But, with her…” Awkward transition. ‘But’ does not work well at the beginning of the sentence here.

　　改正后：In spite of an immense workload, she tackled every task, no matter how trivial or monotonous, with great patience and meticulous care. Moreover, driven by her creative mind, she never settled with merely completion of her job.

　　（4）原句：Once the problems came in, she thought them from unique angles and put forward many good ideas to solve them.

　　编辑分析：“put forward” Better word…presented…suggested…

　　改正后：Once aware of the problems, she attacked them from unique angles and presented many practical and novel solutions.

　　（5）原句：Facing the conflict between the shorthand of the school and TOEFL, she chose to instruct her students to finish the courses of Mechanical CAD.

　　编辑分析：“Facing the conflict…” This sentence is somewhat unclear, especially upon the first reading. I have attempted to clarify the situation.

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