"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to The Tonight Show With Conan O Brien. Thank you. Thank you! I have to admit, I think I ve timed this moment perfectly. Think about it. I m on a last place network, I moved to a state that s bankrupt, and The Tonight Show is sponsored by General Motors." --Conan O Brien 女士们，先生们，欢迎收看《柯南·奥布莱恩今晚秀》，谢谢大家，谢谢大家，我不得不承认，我觉得我安排的这个时间太完美了。想想啊，我在一家排名垫底的电视台，我搬到了一个破产的州，这个今晚秀还是通用赞助的。——柯南·奥布莱恩 "Despite opposition from the public, President Obama says he s determined to close the prison at Guantanamo Bay. To make sure Guantanamo Bay closes, Obama said the new warden will be the CEO of General Motors." --Conan O Brien 尽管遭到公众的反对，奥巴马总统还是说他决定关闭关塔那摩湾的监狱。为了确保关塔那摩被关了，奥巴马说，新的监狱长将由通用的CEO来担任。——柯南·奥布莱恩 "Hey, how about General Motors? Oh, my gosh. It s crazy what s going on. General Motors, bankrupt. Biggest corporation in the world and now they still want money. They still want billions more bailout money. I think I speak for all Americans when I say, You want more money? Wait here while I talk to the manager. I ll be right back." --David Letterman 嘿，通用怎么样了？哦，天哪，这简直是疯了。通用，破产了，世界上最大的公司啊，现在他们还想要钱。他们还想要上亿的财政援助。我想我得替所有的美国人说句话，“你们想要更多的钱？我去跟管理层说一下，在这等着，我马上就回来。” 我要收藏 "Did everyone see Brian Williams special with President Obama that was on? Yeah? Anyway, there s this big NBC News special with Brian Williams, and in the special, President Obama showed Brian Williams what tricks his new puppy, Bo, could do. Isn t that cool? Yeah, in fact, Bo has already learned to sit up and beg for federal bailout money." --Conan O Brien 你们有人看布莱恩·威廉姆斯和奥巴马总统的特别节目了吗？这个布莱恩·威廉姆斯的特别节目里有个大新闻，在节目里，奥巴马总统给布莱恩·威廉姆斯看他的新宠物波会做的动作，这简直太酷了，是吧，事实上，波已经学会坐正了求着要联邦财政援助了。——柯南·奥布莱恩